Fun First Two Weeks

Well, I can't believe it's already been two weeks since school has been out. They have gone by very quickly. The last day of school was Tyriks birthday. 6 already! He got a Ghost Buster gun, Star Wars Light Saber and some army guy stuff, legos, flipflops, and clothes from Grandma Cook. He had a fun day. I made him Ghost Buster cupakes because thats his new obsession. The next day we worked in the yard all day getting the garden planted and tilled and getting the lawn mowed, weeds pulled, etc...It was a long day, but the work was worth it. On Monday which was Memorial Day, we went up Fairview Canyon. Millers Flat wasnt open yet, so we went and fished at Cleavland Reservoir. The kids had a lot of fun. They ended up catching crawdads instead of fish, but they had fun doing it. We roasted marshmallows, had smores, and went for a little hike. It was a really great day. The next day, the kids and I went down to Nevada to visit family. We stopped on the way down to visit my Grandma Ivalee (Nanny) & Grandpa Vaughn (Papa). We got to Mom and Dad Masters around dinner time. The next day we spent the day at their house visiting with Erica & the kids. The kids enjoyed playing with their cousins. It was so hot there though, especially compared to what my kids are used to. Luckily, they got to swim almost everyday. Thursday we went to Korindi's to visit and the kids swam all day. That evening we went to the Reservoir with my Dad and brothers. The kids had fun messing around on the kayaks. Friday we went to Las Vegas and saw my Grandpa Kendall Zobrist, then met at Uncle James's house to go swimming. Aunt Fae with her son James, Aunt Gretchen with Brylee, Jeffrey, and Taylee, and Aunt Jennifer were there. It was so great to see everyone and visit and let the kids swim and have fun together. I really enjoy seeing them. I miss them more than I even expected to. I took the kids to a parking place right across from the airport after that. They loved it. Baylor was so excited! He kept yelling "Airplane! Airplane!" There were helpicopters going in and out and they even watched a big jet land. It was worth going to. On Saturday, it was so fun to have Tana and Tracy Nelson come visit and we went and had dinner at the Copes house with everyone that evening. I love them like family. It was so great to them and visit. We left for home the next morning. I was sad wasng able to see Elliah or Heather on this trip, but hopefully next time. I love my family so much and am so glad we went.
The week we got home, the kids started swimming lessons, with the exception of Wylie & Baylor. They all loved it. I started them on a "summer schedule" now. We get up, go for a walk(most mornings), feed the lambs and sheep, went to swimming lessons, came home, did chores, read for 30 minutes and then the kids can play for the rest of the day. It has worked pretty well most days. I am surprised how much of a difference swimming lessons made this time, especially for Aynslee. She will now put her face under the water for quite a while and isnt afraid at all. Wylie & Ryland were able to go to an unexpected last minute basketball camp at Wasatch Academy. They really liked it. They said it gave them a lot of individual time because there were only 14 kids total. We are glad they went. Plus, it was nice that it was so close. Conley & Kayla came to visit for one night last week. Their girls are just too cute! Madi is taller than Tyrik and is so beautiful! Their new baby Ashtyn was more than loved here. Even Baylor was loving and hugging and kissing her. He was mad because he wanted to keep holding her. It was so funny to witness. Most babies he hates and has no interest in or is just jealous if I hold them. All of us just fell in love with her. I was so grateful to see them.
The next day we headed up to Lagoon for the day with the Slade family. It wad fun because everyone was there. Even Jeffrey & Anna with their kids, and Aubree & Neil's family too. My Mom & Dad Slade brought their trailer there and had a camp set up right outside the park, so you could go in and out. It was so nice ! We left Baylor with a sitter and unfortunately Spencer had to work, but it was so fun to see the kids go on rides and enjoy new things. My older kids were able to go on big rides with uncles, while I went with the Tyrik & Aynslee on the smaller rides. I was so surprised how brave Aynslee was. She loved stuff that would have scared me as a kid for sure! Wylie even went on the Skycoaster. It drops you on a freefall, lond of like bungee jumping. I did it years ago and it scared the heck out of me. He was pretty brave and even liked it. The funnest moment of the day was going on a ride with Aynslee & Tyrik after dark that twirled you around. Well, I thought it would make them squish to my side, but instead, Tyrik & I were pulled to Aynslee's side. Tyrik ended up behind her and they laughed and laughed the whole ride. Tyrik kept yelling " See Mom, I told you this one would be fun!" Because he kept begging me to go on it. I laughed until I cried because they were so happy and funny! The older kids braved big rides and had a lot of fun! It was great to spend time with the family! Cory is now engaged to a girl named Emily(ya, another Emily in the family), he brought her. She seems really nice and great for him. I am so happy for him. He just turned 31 and has seemed like he just wanted to settle down for the last couple of years to me. He is getting married in August.
Lets see, this week we just had a pretty normal week. We played at Mt. Pleasant's new splash pad yesterday with Chavonne and her kids. We went swimming at the Nephi pool with Cassie Johnson and her kids. Wylie is still working for Grandpa and Ryland has helped too. I really love summer. It is such a great time to spend with my kids, and enjoy the warm weather. I love it! I have even been able to get some projects around the house done that have needed to be done, so that makes me happy. :)
Even though I still get stressed out sometimes taking care of the house and the kids, I truly enjoy my life. I feel very blessed and grateful to Heavenly Father for my family and all that I have in my life. Until next time.

Motherhood

Sigh.....Motherhood is....Motherhood is  the hardest, most wearing, tiring, never ending job I have ever done. Its always at the end of the day that the guilt sets in. When they are asleep, you look at their sweet innocence and remember just how blessed you are. You also realize just how hard on them you were that day. Its so easy and clear to know exactly how you should and want to be as a Mother when you are not in the middle of it. Even when you have a conversation about a certain situation with other mothers, its easy to clearly know how it should be handled. Yet, that same situation could happen with your kids the next day and you could completely flip out because emotions, fatigue, a mood swing might just get in the way. I hate so badly knowing how I should be mothering, but feeling like I fail miserably everyday because of mood swings, fatigue, PMS, etc... I do have good days, but most I feel I regret atleast something I said or did. I want to be a perfect mother more than anything right now. I want my children to feel loved, valued, listened to, safe to open up, etc... sigh....I just hope I can get to a point where I can make them feel all of these things before its too late. I try so hard. I just wish I was different. I want to be better. I guess I need to keep praying for help.

Such a Good Birthday

Growing up, I remember when my parents turned 30 and thinking they were getting up there. Then they turned 40 and I really thought they were getting old. Now at 35, I realize, I am still young. I have such a long life yet to live and so much to learn and to getter better at. I have to admit, 35 bugs me a little, but oh well. Its just a number. I feel younger than that. Time goes by so quickly. Its amazing and sad.
So today was interesting because having a birthday on a Sunday, and on a dat when it rained all day isnt my idea of the perfect day. That being said, it turned out to be one of the best. Spencer surprised me with a new dress lastnight for church, which is way pretty. He also surprised me with probably the best surprise I have had. So I havent been able to find ny wedding ring since March. I thought I dropped it in the car. But after looking and looking, I had no luck. I was discouraged, but I was still hopeful that I would find it. I prayed a lot to find it. I became more and more worried that I would never see it again as time went by. Well, lastnight Spencer gave me a little bag. I couldnt see because I already turned the lights off to go to bed. I was feeling it and went to turn the bathroom light on to see what it possibly could be. Well, come to find out, he found my ring in his car. Before the day I wore it, I had lost a small diamond out of it and the prongs needed some help. He said he saw that it was in such bad shape, so he took it in to get fixed. It looks brandnew! I was so surprised, grateful, and happy! So even before this morning, I was happy. I wore my new dress and ring ofcourse to church. I enjoyed teaching my class. Sacrament was a little rough, but whats new. Relief Society was a great reminder of how I need to become a better scripture reader and how important it is. Spencer was able to come home this afternoon. He made me a yummy salmon dinner, and Marian brought a cake and had lunch with us. My Mom and Dad Slade came down because Kaylese flew to Idaho to visit Aubree with Donette and Ryland and Tyrik had stayed overnight with my Dad for their birthdays. So they brought them back and went with us to the older kids piano recital. They all played so well. Chavonne made a cake and brought it there for me too. Then afterwards. My Mom and Dad came to the house to sing to me before they left. Then the whole family sat on the back deck and watched lighting and listened to thunder, which was awesome! Alyson and Chavonne stopped by with gifts afterwards and more chocolate. Then, my Grandma Slade called me to end my great day. Not to forget all the sweet messages, phone calls and posts from friends and family. I have always loved my birthday and today was no different. Spencer did so great making it special.
Friday night was so fun. Alyson, Amy, Chavonne and I went down to the Bank(Tracy & Marian's building) and watched "Moms Night Out", which was perfect for our lives right now. We ate yummy food, visited and looked at pictures of each other growing up. I had the best time. I loved it, in fact! I am so grateful to have such good friends. Its such a blessing. I was able to sneak down to the temple this week and do sealings, which was such a great blessing. I spent the day with Spencer Thursday, and got to grocery shop with Chavonne Friday. I know, I got spoiled. I loved every minute :). I need to be honest. I have struggled a lot lately, feeling like maybe something is wrong with me. I dont have a lot of energy, I struggle to accomplish things that used to be easy. I cant focus on hardly anything. I feel like I have "brain fog" most of the time. Yes, its a real thing. Anyhow. I am going to the Dr. Tuesday just to get my thyroid levels, hormone levels, and whatever else I need checked to make sure nothing is off. I hope things get better. We will see. Spencer and I have also had our struggles lately, but I am grateful for Gods hand in our lives. He cares and wants to help us. I can see it. I know we will pull through. I am grateful for the strength God gives me. I better go. Baylor is crying. Until next time.

Waited too Long

I dont know why I wait so long to write. It makes me sad because I know there are things I will miss or forget. I wish I would take the time to write every night, so that I could remember every detail.
So on March 22nd, we celebrated Baylors birthday. It was the same night as a Republican Caucas meeting, so his party was short and sweet. We sang, had cupcakes and he opened presents. I am sad that he is growing out of the baby stage. It really makes me wish they would just stay tiny. He has started to talk so much, just since his birthday. He now says a couple of words together such as, "Get out", or Daniel Baylor or I funny. He is such a joy. He is so cute it is hard to believe sometimes, and he is just a pretty happy little chap. He has started to throw more tantrums and escape the house and our yard a lot, but he really is pretty happy most of the time. So we were able to go up the Museum of Natural curiosity on Wednesday of Spring Break with Donette, then we went to St George Thursday and really enjoyed the nice weather down there. We hiked. Spencer and Wylie rode dirtbikes, Ryland, Wylie & Spencer went for a long bike ride, we took them swimming. Then on Saturday, we went to Mom & Dad Masters for conference. It was nice because Colby & Erica and the kids came to visit too. We even went out to the Res and let the kids tryout their kyaks. We drove home Sunday. It was such a fun week and great break for the kids and Spencer & I. I loved conference as always. It is so uplifting and gives so much guidance. Chelsea Peckham got married, my cousin Jesse Larson got married and Kaylese had a competition that night. Wylie finished basketball season, which he was very happy about. He has been riding his motorbike a lot more, which he really enjoys. Spencer turned 37, which is just crazy and hard to believe. We celebrated with a lot of good food. Steak, crab, rolls, banana pie. It was a good day. We planted a couple of new trees in our backyard last weekend. We got a couple of bummer lambs this week, which the kids have loved. Kaylese is finishing dance this week and starting to practice for hef first year ever of softball. Tyrik is also playing baseball and has started practicing. It has been nice weather this past couple of weeks, so we've been able to go for walks and go to the park, which the kids loved.
I have been trying so hard lately to get back on a schedule and be more organized. Its been hard with the kids since spring break. I am trying though. I have been feeling kind of down. I think because of the unpredictable weather and  not feeling organized and feeling tired a lot still. I am hoping things are starting to turn around. I had such a good Sunday yesterday. I felt very spiritually uplifted and my lesson went pretty well, so I hope I can use that to make my week go better. I am in a costant battle with myself about trying to be kind to the kids, but then not letting them get away with everything and teaching them to work and be responsible. Its a hard thing for me to figure out. Well, I will try to write more often so I can get more detail into it. Until then.

What a Day

Well, today was Sunday. It is usually my favorite day of the week. Today, however, was not so. I was very happy to make it on time to 9:00 church, especially with the time change. Well, by the opening song, Baylor and Aynslee were already fighting and Baylor screamed of loud I had to take him out. I had a shorter fuse than usual pretty much all day with the kids, which didn't help, and I had a really hard time fasting, and felt weak and almost delirious, which didn't help either. Anyways, Spencer was conducting, he gave a great testimony, but all the new callings and the rest of sacrament I couldn't even hear because by the 4th time I took Baylor out, I just stayed out. He cried and cried.....it was so frustrating!! I didn't get to take the bread, which made me madder. I gave a lesson in the atonement that I thought would be so good, but they didn't really listen or seem to take it that well. Then I ended up subbing in Nursery instead of going to Relief Society. I knew they needed my help, but I so look forward to Relief Society and the spiritual upliftment it gives me, so I was bummed about that too. I came home with a plan to do things to make the Sabbath a "delight" and it didn't work. Wylie wanted to do his own thing, wouldn't participate in any of it and went around teasing his siblings until they would scream, it drove me nuts! Then poor Spencer came home starving and I didn't get his text, so I didn't have the food ready on time. The roast I thought would be so great, turned out dry. The kids made big messes and now after prayers a d scriptures, I realize how impatient and not understanding Spencer and I are as parents. Kaylese went to bed upset because both Spencer and I had hurt her feelings. SIGH. I am still so grateful for my life. I know I am so blessed, it was just one of those days where we had the combination of my onery self and kids who didn't feel like listening. I just want a schedule, I want to be organized, planned out and have a plan for discipline. I am sick of over reacting and regretting it. I want to be a perfect, patient mother and I want Spencer and I to be on the same page all the time. It is so hard though. I need help. I can't do it alone. I feel tired and frustrated most of the time. I am sick of it. I guess I need to change things. I need to be better at exercising, praying, reading, and being calmer with my kids. Same stuff I have always struggled with. I am frustrated with myself. I hope with God's help and my determination, that I can be a do better. Until next time, Justine.

Ryland's Birthday & Stake Conference

Well, it's official- Ryland is 11, where has time gone? He is such a smart, tenderhearted, fun, and talented boy. I am grateful that he is in our family. He got to go play laser tag, have Pizza Pie Cafe, and watch a Star Wars movie on Saturday with Spencer, Wylie, Kaylese, Tyler Peckham, Braxton Allred, and Cayton Lund. He said they had a lot of fun. The next day we had a party for him at our house. Winston, Jamie and their kids, along with Preston and his kids and Marian and Tracy came. He got shoes, church clothes, a hat, and a Lego Star Wars guy. He got a few games for the xbox, but he didn't get the until Monday because they came late. Anyhow, overall, I think it was a good day or weekend for him. He just finished his bball season. He has improved so much. He has become a great player. It was fun to watch him. Wylies team took 2nd overall for Junior Jazz. He still has accelerated Basketball going though. His age is a lot more competitive, so he doesn't get played as much as we would like, but he still does well and has learned a lot. Kaylese had her first competition at Thanksgiving point a couple of weeks ago. They did great. So they scored them according to points they could get and they scored 1st place points, so that was a good start. It was really fun to watch her too.
At church on Ryland's birthday, they announced the changes in the ward boundaries. They created a 3rd ward for both Moroni and Fountain Green. We stayed in the 1st ward and didn't gain anyone. Our boundary is on 100 No, then over to the South end of the little subdivision out on the West road. Everyone North of us is now the 3rd ward, with Darren Owens as Bishop, Ron Oldroyd as 1st counselor and Clint Hansen as 2nd Counselor. That was a neat surprise. Everyone living past the subdivision on the West road, such as the Stallings, and Elaine Anderson, and Dixie Cook, all ended up in the new boundaries of the 2nd ward. They are still 200W and East of that in FG, but they lost everyone that lives 100 No and over, and gained everyone in Freedom, and all those living along the highway between here and Moroni and those living on this side of the T on the west road. So it will be interesting to see how it all works. We will have our first Sunday as a new 1st ward this Sunday. I am grateful we are still in 1st ward, but think it will be fun for those in the new formed wards as well. I am bummed Chavonne isn't in our ward, especially living that close, but it doesn't matter. It's not like we saw each other a lot at church anyway. So those were hard changes for some people, but I now they were inspired and that Pres. Peckham follows the Spirit, so it should be good. So I wanted to mention that we had Stake conference this last weekend. Spencer had to work late, but I was able to attend the temple session for stake conference on Thursday with Chavonne. It was a huge session and it was a good one. I have to say, I have now begun to recognize that every time I go to the temple with worries or a prayer in my heart about something, my prayers are answered. In the adult session on Saturday, the speakers talked about being better parents and they said things that were on my mind at the temple. I felt so grateful and blessed when I heard their messages. God really does answer prayers and He really does care about our worries. They also talked about making the Sabbath a delight. I feel grateful that we have a temple this close to us and hope I can continue attending it often. It makes life better. It truly blesses you and your family. So, I need to talk about a funeral we attended last week. So one of Spencers second cousins from Moroni, who married a Dyches from Moroni passed away the week before. Her name is Emily Dyches. She was married to Eric Dyches and they have five children ages 15, 12, 9, 6 & 11 months. She had been struggling really bad with post partum depression and anxiety. She had an anxiety attack while in the car with her Father and tried to get out while he was driving her home to Salem. He stopped on the side of the freeway to try and calm her down and she got out and ran in front of a semi. Saddest thing I have heard in a long time. My heart aches for her and her family. To have it that bad, I can't imagine. The poor lady. And now her poor husband. He is Bishop in their ward. He just had to hire a Nanny to keep things going. Both their parents are heart broken. The funeral was amazing. Her siblings told funny stories and sweet memories about her. Her Dad shared how strongly he felt about the importance of telling those you love that you do love them and why and to take time with each one of them. He said he felt the help of Angels form the other side helping him. Her daughter sang Families Can Be Together Forever, such a sweet and perfect song. Her three older children spoke. I was so impressed with the 12 & 15 year old son maturity. They both have strong testimonies and talked about how Christ like she was. Her husband gave the best talk I have heard at a funeral. He shared so many scriptures and talked about his impressions from her were about Faith conquers Fear, and Good conquers Evil, and how God's hand was in this. He told all of the husbands to please date their wives more often and love everything about them. He said how hard the past year had been but how grateful He was to go through it with her. He is starting a foundation to bring more awareness and resources to those with post partum depression. He even wants to help husbands know how to help. He said she was in the hospital for two weeks because it got so bad, but then she came home and he said they had the perfect two weeks before this happened. It was such a sweet tribute to her. I am grateful for her example in my life. It makes me want to be a more loving Christ like Mother. Also, to appreciate my time with my family more. She was only 39.
Marians brother Ralph passed away the other day. He has battled cancer for years, poor guy. I am so grateful for my knowledge of God's plan. I don't know what I would do without it. I hope I can bring others to this knowledge. I hope I can become the Mother my kids need before it's too late. I have so much of work on and I struggle with so much. I love them with all my heart though and am so grateful that Spencer makes it possible for me to stay home. I wouldn't miss it for the world. We were able to go through the Provo Center Temple Open House Friday, well, some of us. Baylor was being so naughty that Spencer ended up staying out with him and Wylie was with Grandpa Tracy. It was so beautiful! Aynslee kept saying " Mom, it's so bootiful! I love the sparklies! " I feel so blessed to have more than one temple so close to us. I love my family so much and my Heavenly Father.  Until Next time. Justine Cook

Great Week!

So last Sunday was Valentines Day. Spencer spoiled me and the girls with flowers and getting our nails done. Yes, they were very excited! The boys have been busy with basketball and doing well. Kaylese busy performing her trio with Rianna and Ashley, which turned out cute. This last Wednesday, Spencer & I went to Nevada and took the three youngest to my parents in Logandale. We stayed that night and then left early to Vegas because he had a conference for work there. The three oldest stayed here and Emily Peckham (Revoir) helped watch them because they had school and activities they needed to stay for. The younger three really enjoyed staying at Gr & Gr Masters house. Tyrik ended up getting stitches in his forehead while down there. He tripped and hit his head on their rocking chair and split it open. She took him to the ER for me and handled it so I didn't have to leave Vegas. I felt so bad, but because of the drive, I couldn't make it in time to take him anyway. Thank goodness for her. I was also to shop, relax, watch TV, spend time with Spencer and get some much needed sunshine!!! We went to see Cirque De Sol Liel which was awesome! We went to the Vegas Temple which is my favorite!! We had good food and got to visit, which is a rarity at home. We were there Thursday to Saturday afternoon, then we went back to my parents house and had dinner with Colby & Erica and their kids, which was really nice. My parents are buying a house in Logandale, or we went to see it. I am happy for them. Then this morning. we went to church with them because my Dad was speaking. He did a great job. He is on their High Council. We spent a little more time visiting with them at their house and then drove home. Spencer went to get the other kids at Marian and Tracys because they spent the day there. It was a much needed break from reality, but it is nice to be home and back together as a family. I am grateful for my blessings and hope I can be a better Mother. Until next time.